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Full Transcript:

Note: This is an automated transcript and misspells or grammar errors may be present.

Welcome to Courageous Parenting Podcast, a weekly show to equip parents with biblical truth on raising confident Christian kids in an uncertain world.

Hi, I’m Angie from Courageous.

Mom and Isaac from Resolute Man Together pursuing the mission to impact 10 million families and their legacies for the Kingdom of God.

We’ve been married for 23 years and are seeing the fruit from raising our nine children biblically. Based on the raw truth found in the Bible.

We can no longer let the culture win the hearts of children, as too many from Christian families are walking away from their faith by the age of 18. And it doesn’t have to be this way. It shouldn’t be this way.

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If you want access to all the episodes, show notes, and other biblically based resources, go to Be Courageous Ministry.

Org. Join us as we start another important conversation about effective parenting in a fallen world. Welcome back to the podcast. So glad you’re here.

Hey everybody.

Talking about who’s spiritually leading your family.

This might seem like a simple question, but actually there could be a lot of different answers to this question depending on someone’s circumstances.

We’re going to dive into this, and it’s really important to actually think about this, to not just have a first glance at this title, but to really think about it. This episode will help you think about it. But to be introspective, to be really honest, no, really. Who is spiritually leading your family?

You know, it’s interesting, when we were first planning this out and talking, one of the conversations that Isaac and I had is that, you know, sometimes when as as parents start getting older and their kids start having their own opinions and they’re trying to make their faith their own, and they’re struggling if they are opposed to being led by their parents and they allow other influences to lead them, then sometimes that’s reflective in their lifestyle choices. And then we see it actually leading adult parents into changing their doctrine. So that would be in that circumstance, an example of a child actually spiritually leading a family.

Then there’s the dynamics of husband and wife. What happens when the husband gets home? Is the wife actually leading, the husband leading? Are they both leading? I hope so, but we’ll talk about the dynamics of that from a biblical lens.

You know what’s also important? One of the questions that we get a lot is in regards to, um, what if in a marriage only one spouse is a believer and the other isn’t? Or maybe they’re both believers, but only one spouse is really taking their faith seriously. So that this is another good question. We’re going to talk about that more and what that looks like when like only a wife is a believer. Or maybe you’re both believers, but one’s maybe going through more of the motions and just doing it right, checking it off the list, but maybe lacking the relationship. So stay tuned. That’s going to be at the end.

And also an incredible single moms and dads out there. Yeah. How does that look? And when you’re busy and working and all these things. So anyways there’s a lot to this question. And there’s of course, you know, the normal Christian rhythms of, you know, how church is involved too. And sometimes parents are over delegating and just making some assumptions that because they’re getting so many good things from the church, which praise the Lord if that’s the case. Yeah, um, that they let up at home to what really is required. We believe in what we see in the Bible for really discipling your children, especially in these times.

Mhm. Yeah. And you know, this is going to lead us into other topics as well as talking about, you know, how influential is social media or other peers or friends, right. Or even maybe parents of your kids friends and their influence on your family culture, on your family belief system. And so this is going to be a really exciting topic. As you can tell, we have a lot of things to talk about right now.

So buckle your seat belts. But before we jump in, thank you for being part of the 10 Million Legacies movement. Uh, we feel like God has called us to, uh, have a meaningful impact through putting good information out there. Good courses, good books, good free content with workshops, podcasts, uh, and so forth. Free downloads, all kinds of things we’re always thinking about and trying to listen to the Lord on what’s next and what’s most important to further this movement. When you share on social media, when you give at Be Courageous Ministry org, when you, uh, raise your hand and just give a shout out on social media, all of those things, uh, five star reviews on podcast, Apple and Google and Spotify. When you’re on YouTube and you subscribe, it helps the channel. All of that stuff is like raising your hand and saying, I’m in. I believe in what you guys are doing. I want to be a part of it. And we notice. We notice every comment. We notice every single written review, all of those things. And it really does help us and spur us on. This isn’t easy work. Those of you that know that are in full time ministry, it’s not easy at all. And nothing great is easy. What you do, I’m sure, isn’t easy because I’m sure it’s great too. So it’s really important to, um, have a team support one another and support one another. And we appreciate you guys. So all right so let’s start with the challenge here. One of the well a few of the problems that exist when we talk about who is spiritually leading your home is well, let me just be frank. In my opinion, in most not all, but most Christian families, no one is continually spiritually leading in the home. Wow, Isaac, how could you say that?

It’s it’s the truth.

When.

You’re talking about most not all, like you said, but most. And I think that there’s also an element of going in and out of being better at it. Right? What you’re saying is no one is continually so on a over a course of a five year period, you could go. You know what? One thing that we stuck to was being intentional about discipleship and leading our kids in Scripture, right? And so, like, if that’s not something that you can answer to, and I think that, you know, everyone has like moments of sickness and different things like that. But if there’s like a large chunk of time, what we’re talking about is the need that children’s children have to be discipled every day. And the exhortations that we see in Scripture, the commands we see in Scripture, from God to parents about their authority, about the jurisdiction and raising their children and understanding that it truly is our responsibility. And so, you know, I just want to share one of the verses that we kind of we decided to share with you guys today is in Second Timothy chapter four. It’s verses one through five. And before I share it, I want you to think for a second when we’re reading through this passage and ask yourself if this is, um, a symptom of something that you see growing in one of your children, or if this is a symptom of what you see happening to the youth in your church, even because that is a fruit.

What I’m going to read you is actually a symptom of a fruit. And this is a really big problem and God has something to say about it, says, I charge you in the presence of God and Christ Jesus. This is Second Timothy chapter four, verses one through five. I charge you in the presence of God and Christ Jesus, who is the judge of the living and the dead, and by his appearing and his kingdom preach the word. Okay, God is telling us to preach the the word. You guys, he says, preach the word. Be ready in season and out of season. Reprove, rebuke and exhort with complete patience and teaching it. Doesn’t this apply to parents so well? What do we have to do in our jobs with our children? Right? We preach the word. We reprove, we rebuke and exhort with complete patience and teaching. That’s our goal. Verse three for the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears, they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own passions and will turn away from listening to the truth and wander off into myths.

I’m sure that none of us want to see that happen to our kids. As for you, always be sober minded, endure suffering, do the work of an evangelist, and fulfill your ministry. This scripture is such a huge encouragement to me as a mom, because while the world is telling you that what you’re doing in your home, if you’re a stay at home mom, or if you’re choosing to be at home with your kids and work from home on the side. But you’re like investing in your kids, the world will tell you, well, well, what are you doing though? What are you doing to contribute? I’m sorry, I am in full time ministry in my home and I’m going to own it and I’m going to preach it and I’m going to I’m going to value that. And I hope my kids understand that that is something that is worthy and of great value. And we as moms get to do the work of an evangelist and fulfill the ministry that God gave us. And the same goes for husbands.

Absolutely. And and I think, I think you believe that because you’re continually rising up to that. So you’re seeing the fruit of your efforts. You’re seeing that your influence matters because you’re trying to influence. And I know you feel this, that sometimes, you know, it doesn’t feel that way in the moment. Uh, there’s discouragements there’s challenges sometimes, but overall unappreciated. But overall, I know, you know, you not only know the biblical truth on this, but you live it out. And so therefore you can have that level of conviction in it. And I just want to encourage everybody to truly live it out, including the husbands. We need to be the spiritual leaders of our home. But women are also very important spiritual leaders. We’ll get into that in a little bit, but I want to speak to the church’s role really quick. You know, we did a whole episode on our thoughts about youth programs and so forth. It’s one of the most popular episodes, actually. I was recently looking it’s in the top ten ever. Yeah. And wow, at a.

Way out of 200 and like 80. Yeah.

So and we absolutely believe in the church, we believe in youth programs, we believe in these things. But what we don’t believe in is parents not being the most important role. See, these things are good and helpful. They should validate and encourage all of the things already happening by parents in their home. Parents need to be the main thing, the the main influences that are discipling their children. That’s what courageous parenting is all about. And the church and you take them to church. And then there’s other adults validating that are qualified, validating what you’re doing and teaching the Bible and being, uh, even a refining process to what they’ve been taught.

But, you know, it is so important about that, as you were sharing that. It just got me thinking about that is why it’s so important that you’re going to a church where there’s like. Christ followers that you can trust that are going to be saying the same things that you’re saying when you’re discipling your kids, where the youth pastor, for example, because that’s what you were just bringing up instead of pointing children to themselves as the spiritual authority. Oh, you can call me any time. And and you should. You know, I’m more than happy to study spiritual gifts with you. And we can do that. And and that’s that’s great and that’s generous. But hey, what about pointing kids back to their parents and saying, have you talked to your parents about that? Understanding that God actually gave their parents the authority and the position to be the ones that are fully discipling their children? And then if the the kid is saying, yeah, I asked my parents and they’re just really not interested, then stepping in the gap for the parents and reaching out to the parents and saying, hey, did you know your kid is asking these questions? It should be a team, not a competition. Yeah, absolutely. Because everybody has doctrine and everyone is not necessarily in alignment unless you can honestly say that, you know, without a shadow of a doubt, that the people that are speaking into your kids lives believe exactly the same thing, that you believe on all points of doctrine, then you’re in a position where you could end up having division in your own family. You got to go listen to our podcast episode On a Divided House.

Here’s a healthy church. A healthy church, uh, that is equipping the next generation. Yes, they’re offering some things for the next generation. But most importantly, to add on to what Angie’s talking about is they are expecting parents, equipping parents, and encouraging parents to disciple their children because discipleship has to be a way of life. It has to be a natural rhythm of parenting. We have to be pointing people to God, our children, to God all of the time, having the challenging conversations and seeing what Scripture says about it, correcting our children and pointing them to Christ and sharing scripture with them. Table talks at breakfast or at dinner or whenever you do it. And these kinds of things are super, super important. And Deuteronomy six six through nine it says, and these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk, by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise, you shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as friendless between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.

And you’ve probably heard that before. If you haven’t. Either way, it’s such an important scripture because we are always to be training our children. We’re always to be equipping them every second. No, no, I think you know what I mean. But a daily basis, it needs to be the major intent of our parenting if we do that consistently. Most importantly, while loving our children well, I think the rest will work itself out. But if we don’t prioritize that as most important, if we have this facade and believing that what’s happening at church in midweek is enough and I can just make sure they’re fed, love them, and take them to the next sports gig, then you’re terribly wrong. You’re not likely. I hope you do, but not likely going to have the fruit you want. The stats don’t lie. About 80% of children raised in Christian homes walk away from the church by age 18, so you can’t defy the odds unless you’re doing something differently. And what is the thing that needs to be done differently? The Bible clearly states that parents need to be equipping, discipling, loving on their kids and pointing them to Christ.

Yeah, it’s interesting too, because you could think about the schools that are out there and there are well intentioned institutions that are even Christian academies or Christian schools, right. And a lot of parents who maybe feel ill equipped or they feel inadequate for teaching, they will delegate that kind of discipleship and teaching and, and knowledge based education of Scripture and things like that to a school. Right. And they’ll pay a lot of money to do so. And I know that the intentions are right, but at the end of the day, what are your kids learning and is it in alignment with what you believe? And if it isn’t, is that ever going to surface in your family relationships down the road, ten, 20, 30, 40 years? And is that going to impact the unity in your family as well as faith? Like, this is the thing, going to a school and gaining knowledge like I can even think of seminary. I’m just going to bring that up for a second because seminary, I went to a Bible college, actually, I went to two of them and I, you know, I was learning a lot of things. Some were in alignment with what I was raised and with what my parents believed. Some was not. And I was on a journey of really searching for truth and growing in my faith.

And it was a really powerful experience in my life. But here’s the thing I still pursued having conversations with both my mom and dad about a lot of the things, but there were still things that they had no idea about, just simply because I was living far away from them. And I think that that is a huge reality that most kids experience. And they go away to school. And it takes a different kind of intentionality, a relational intentionality to have your kids coming to you and sharing those things and feeling like it’s a safe place where they can talk about them. And I think this is the thing. I think that a lot of kids, when they’re growing up and they’re getting, you know, they’re learning knowledge about God sometimes within that 80% that end up walking away from the faith or leaving the church. They think they know God. They think they’ve already tried out religion because they went to a Christian school and they gained knowledge, or they went to Sunday school every day, growing up, every Sunday growing up. And so they know what the Bible is. They know that Jesus died on the cross for their sins, and he rose again from the grave. And they know these like they know stories, and that what they’re told is that their stories versus told that their history and all of these things make a massive impact on our kids.

But this is the final thing, you guys. It’s not about what you know. It’s about relationship. And relationship is first modeled in our relationships with our kids within our marriage and like really striving to teach our kids that the most important thing, first and foremost is to know God and to know him. Yeah, we read the Bible and we gain knowledge, but it’s a relationship and it’s those kids that understand relationship and are taught like you have to put in effort. You have to pursue God in the same way because it’s a two way street. Those are the kids that are less likely to walk away from the faith. And that’s a discipleship thing that happens. Yes, every day throughout the day when you’re sitting, when you’re rising, when you’re standing, when you’re laying down. And it’s really important that we recognize the power of the ministry that God has given us, and he’s given it to us, the parents. So whatever. However many kids you have, like recognizing. God chose me to be their parent, not that person over there. That’s right. To own it.

That’s right. So let’s talk about husbands and wives. Um, first of all, let’s see what the Bible says about this and then we’ll dive into it. I believe we’re going to give a very biblical and balanced perspective on this. You know, whenever we do something like this, we always gain some listeners and lose some listeners. But we believe we’re saying exactly what the Bible says with a balanced view on it.

Yeah. So we’re just going to dive into some of the hardest scriptures here that tend to be controversial in the world today. Um, first Corinthians chapter 11. We’re gonna go through verse three and maybe a couple more verses says, but I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of every wife is her husband, and the head of Christ is God. That’s kind of really clear. Yeah, not kind of. It’s just really clear. And I think that people have a hard time hearing verses that are like that because our, in our nature, it’s it is hard to hear that sometimes, especially if you’re a woman, especially with the feminist movement that’s out there and this, um, you know, Isaac and I, we did this courageous marriage series. It’s in the Be Courageous app, by the way, and it’s free in there. If you you can get the Be Courageous app for a week for free and try it out. And you could go through all our videos, but the very first one is on oneness. And we’re going to see a little portion of Scripture here that talks about the importance of oneness, because. Ultimately, what we’re talking about is who is spiritually leading your family. We just read a verse that said husbands are the head of every wife. So the conclusion would be.

Well, is that the husbands are the spiritual leaders of their families, but wives are very important spiritual leaders also. And I think that it would be a huge detriment if wives weren’t intentionally reading scripture to their children. I mean, they’re with them more hours than husbands are in this day and age, and probably in past too. So it is so important that women are equipped and and and also when we think about the Scripture. Husband and wives are equal in value, but made differently, male and female made differently. And they’re a team. And any time you have a successful team, you just look at team dynamics. Anytime there’s a successful team, there is somebody leading and there’s also a group of leaders usually. But there is the the buck stops somewhere and hopefully if a husband is leading well, the buck stops actually with Christ. They are submitted to Christ and they are servant leaders. They are doing everything for the best interest of their wife and their family and not their own self-interest. And they are trying their best to lead in that selfless kind of way and looking to Christ as an example of how to lead. None of us are going to do it perfect. We stub our toes and our wives are are forgiving. Wives stubbed their toes too. And that’s it. But but two become one flesh. We become a team, and that team isn’t working properly. If both parents aren’t focused on the discipleship of their children.

Yeah. And understanding that that’s really a mission that you’re on together. The discipleship of your children is a ministry. It’s a mission that you’re on together with your spouse. When we look at Ephesians chapter five, verse 22 and 23, it says, wives, submit to your own husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church, his body and is himself its Savior. Like understanding that God has order for his glory and God in these scriptures. If you were to go back and read more of first Corinthians 11 and Ephesians five, you’re going to see that this is to show that there is an example of of the church, and we get to be lights to the world when we’re operating in this biblical way of having marriage and having spiritual leadership within our families. It’s a light to the world of what the church is supposed to actually be like. And that’s what’s so encouraging about it. And that’s why we chose this scripture. It says, for the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church. Look at that imagery. The image bearing is happening right there.

One of the things I see as my job is to make sure the children value and want to hear from their mom, want to hear spiritual things from their mom. So it’s really yes, I do things that are you would talk about are spiritual leadership. But in addition, I do things that help her also lead well and to be able to be listened to and respected by all the children and so forth. And I very easily could do things. And I’ve made this mistake before, uh, where I do things that make her not as respected and that is a detriment to the discipleship of our children. It’s a detriment to our family. It is poor leadership. Have I been a poor leader at times? Yes. I think all men have. We’re learning. We’re in a learning process. But I think that if we are going to really take that baton, we want to be then in the Word of God, because the Word of God is going to temper us. There’s no way we can be good leaders without reading the Word of God on a regular basis, not compared to what God has called us to be doing in a way that our wives want. Our leadership want us to be spiritual leading because they also feel encouraged to use their gifts and to share with their children, and to be an important influence, even in spiritual things, with their children.

Yeah. And, you know, wives likewise are not perfect at this either. Right? Like, think of all of the potential grumbling, complaining, whining, pity party looking down on scowling body language. You know, all of the things that potentially women struggle with in regards to respecting their husbands. Right. Um, and how that has an influence on whether the kids are going to actually respect the mom. I’m going to say that it does affect how they look at their their dad, for sure. Like if you’re grumbling, complaining about their dad, they’re going to recognize the thing that you’re grumbling and complaining about, right? And then they may lose respect for him. But really, who are they going to lose more respect from the person that is complaining or not doing a good job leading actually. And so recognizing the power that you both have in your children, having respect for you or not is really, really important. And again, we are not perfect at this by any means, but we’ve learned a lot over the years for sure. We’re a lot better than we were. Right? Um, but I will say that this is something that you need to consciously, purposefully choose to try to get better at and to take before the Lord confess, apologize, repent all of those things in front of your children to at times.

And you know, there’s an interesting verse if you the same chapter that we were just in Ephesians, chapter five, verse 31, you mentioned oneness and in the Courageous Marriage series, our first whole, our teaching is all on oneness. It’s so good, you guys. Um, but we don’t have a lot of time to get into that. But this verse in verse 31, it says, therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast. To his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. That was the verse that you just briefly mentioned. It says this mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. So there’s that imagery again. And it says, however, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband. And so this passage of Scripture, this isn’t a choice. If you’re a Christian, you’re claiming Christ. This is what the Bible says.

I love that it says the guys need to love their wives as if they were like their selves. Right? Um, no man hates their own flesh. And that becomes before wives respect your husbands. There is an order in the way the Scripture comes out. And I don’t know. I think that that is important as leaders by our love is going to make it easier or harder for our wives to respect us and our kids to really.

But it does start with the husband. And I think that there is an important understanding that because Scripture talks about the husband as the head, when the husband is leading poorly, because let me just say something. We when we talk about legacies, we’ve always had this saying that everyone leaves a legacy, whether it’s intentional or unintentional. You are going to leave a legacy, period. What is it going to be? And your leadership will be reflective in your legacy. Actually, um, by God’s grace, he can he can do amazing things despite the sins and mistakes that you make. But we need to take responsibility and understand the power of influence that we have as parents and as husbands and wives, and what we model to our kids trying to live out biblically in a fallen world. That’s so against verses like we just read to you guys can be really hard. You might actually be listening to these going, oh, it’s refreshing to hear those Bible verses. They’re not shying away from verses where it says, wives, submit to your husbands. Have respect for them. They’re not. Oh, there’s a man talking about being a servant leader. And that’s how you lead. And let me just tell you, we will still get people who will persecute and disagree, even though what they’re really disagreeing with is the Word of God, not Isaac and Angie. This is what God’s Word is saying, and we’re just not overlooking Scripture. And we bring it to you. Because the original question posed at the very beginning of the podcast is who is spiritually leading your family?

And the challenge? And the problem is, nobody actually in most Christian families are continuously teaching, training, equipping in godly ways and pointing to Christ and sharing Scripture and teaching Scripture and teaching the ways of God, correcting children on a consistent basis, uh, in a biblical approach and these kinds of things. And that’s why we’re going to get to, um, you know, what happens if a spouse is the only one that’s a believer, or is the only one focused on really discipling, uh, or single moms and dads in a second? But first of all, I just want to invite you, um, this episode in many more that we’ve talked about, is why we created the courageous parenting, uh, mentor program. So the parenting mentor program. And so, just for about a minute, I want you to hear from some people, uh, these are a few of the people over 3000 now that have gone through the program, and it’s massively altered the trajectory of their legacy.

Steve and I realized that we were getting too comfortable with the world’s vision of how to raise our children.

What Angie and Isaac have done in creating this is literally phenomenal.

This program provided awesome scripture based teachings and just some really great practical applications.

This class has just really rocked my world.

It has given me a vision for not just the different things that we might focus on as parents who are trying to raise our kids biblically, like how our kids are behaving or what we’re doing with discipline, but also the things of the heart.

We now have a game plan to how we want to raise our children. We have so many answers to the questions that have been in our mind.

It’s not just these hypothetical situations or it’s not just this. Here’s what I think you should do. It’s let me show you where in Scripture this is.

Do your legacy a favor and yourself a favor and just do it.

One of the best things that we’ve done this year, one of the best investments we’ve made this year. And I could not recommend it more.

We’re no longer fearing dark days ahead, but we’re so excited to raise lights to be leaders for the next generation.

Okay, so let’s dive into, um, the situational stuff, right?

So in a marriage, sometimes there are two people who are married and they’re yoked and they’re both professing believers, but maybe one is more intentional than the other, usually. So we’ve been at this ministry thing for quite a few years and we get a lot of messages. So I would say overwhelmingly we get more messages from women saying that their husbands are not believers or they’re not leading spiritually and asking how they can help their husbands and encourage them to be leaders. Um, you know, this is something that we have written about. We’ve done podcasts on. So just look through our podcast. From that. We’ve also talked about it more in the Be Courageous app, and we talk about it specifically in that Courageous Marriage series that’s in the Be Courageous app. But this is a really it’s almost like it’s a epidemic. Yeah. Um, in especially Western culture, I’m going to say Western culture, Western religion. Um, because there has been a rebellion against tradition and a rebellion against even biblical gender roles, and there is always going to be a consequence for that rebellion. There’s always going to be a ripple effect that affects generations, even. And you may not even be aware of some of the remnants of the generational sin or the generational attitudes and perspectives that are not biblical worldviews. But I guarantee you, if you are desiring to love God in His Word and live it out as he says, the more you seek him, the more your mind will be renewed and it will literally transform your marriage. And I just want to encourage those women that are married to unbelievers.

I wish I would have, um, brought this scripture. I think that it’s in first Peter chapter three. Let me just grab it really quick here. Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands so that even if some do not obey the word. So a lot of people think that this scripture is talking about people who are unbelievers, like they’re married to an unbeliever. And this definitely could apply in that situation, but this is someone who is being disobedient. If you’re being disobedient to the word, that means you know what the word says and you’re choosing not to do what it says. You’re choosing not to obey. So it says, likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives. And when they see you, respectful and pure conduct. That’s amazing. And this is an encouragement that’s in first Peter chapter three. It’s verse one, and it just continues on talking about how women can live with having the beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit and that that’s precious in God’s sight. And I just want to I think that that’s a huge encouragement to anyone, whether they’re married to someone who is an unbeliever. And they’re they’re kind of aware of what is righteous in a sense. Right? What’s right? Right. Living is literally part of the definition of righteousness. Um, and they’re learning it by your conduct is what the Scripture is saying. And they can be won over by a respectful heart attitude. That’s incredible.

We’ve even got some testimonies, uh, ladies have shared with us through messaging that they’ve this has happened and they’ve seen fruit from it. Also, a great movie, fireproof, uh, is all about that, actually, um, which is, um, you know, came to mind. Yeah.

I think that there’s a real power in us women understanding the sacred influence that we have in our husbands lives. They are still the head spiritual leaders as we read in Scripture. But that doesn’t mean that you aren’t a leader and that you’re not somehow having influence in your husband’s life. When two become one, you influence each other, and that that passage of when a man will leave his mother and father and cleave to the wife, and the two shall become one like that’s in that same chapter about submission and headship for a reason, because we do have an incredible impact on each other’s lives. But this is an encouragement for also the women who are married to a believer who maybe is just more head knowledge, maybe not so much relationship with God. And you see the potential and you want so much for your husband. You’re on fire for the Lord, and you’re growing in your relationship with God. And maybe you’re feeling more distance in your relationship with your husband. And if that’s you right now, I just want to encourage you to be faithful to what you’re learning in the word. You should not be stopping seeking God because your husband is not leading you.

Keep growing, keep growing. Somebody needs to spiritually lead that family, and it’s going to be you. Actually, um, we see evidence and stories in the Bible. Read one in a second of where wives are really important spiritual leaders and become the most important when the husband is not willing to. And so I think that, you know, God will do what God wants to do, and he’s going to make those things happen. In fact, in second Timothy one five, it’s just this great part. It says, I am reminded of your sincere faith, a faith that dwelt first in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice, and now, I’m sure, dwells in you as well. For this reason, I’m I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God which is in you through the laying on of the hands. For God gave us a spirit not of fear, but of power, love, and self control. And it’s so cool, because in this example, Paul is really exhorting Timothy, who is younger and he has a great leadership job as the churches are being planted and he needs to install elders and deacons and Paul’s directing him to do this and so forth, because the church is growing like crazy. Well, where did he who. Discipled Timothy, this great leader in history.

His mom and grandma, his mom.

And grandma actually.

His the time he was little.

From what I can get it. From what I can tell, his dad wasn’t a believer. And so this is really powerful. And so I just want to encourage any wives out there that they should be diligently or single moms, diligently discipling your children, teaching them the ways of God. And yes, there’s more on your shoulders, but we have the understanding and the grace of God that Jesus is there to help you. And and maybe there’s other people that in the church that can be additive, of course. But, you know, take on that role, disciple your children. Wives are so powerful, so important, so influential. Oh, it’s so incredible. You know, it’s so incredible.

Really encouraging is I recently heard a testimony of someone who was in this situation where their husband was calling themselves a believer. They were professing Christ, um, they were going to church sometimes, but not all the time. Right. And not leading or like spiritually in the home or really in any way. And she was she was leading in the home, taking her kids to church, Sunday school, being, you know, involved in VBS, all these things. And her kids as she was discipling them. And her kids really fell in love with Jesus. And it wasn’t just her conduct. It was the fruit that her husband saw in the kids lives that changed his heart towards God and what he thought was religion, but really was relationship with God. And so I want to encourage you to that sometimes. Sometimes it’s not necessarily us, even though we have this desire to like, impact another person’s life, especially someone we love as much as a spouse. But sometimes it’s the fruit from being faithful in the things that God has called us to in all things. That ends up being the thing that really draws our spouse and the person that we love the most. Back to the Lord.

So I hope when you ask yourself the question and you’ve been honest and you think through it, who’s spiritually leading your family, you can raise your hand and confidently say, either I am and have been continually discipling my children. It is a rhythm in my life as a parent and in our home. Or you can confidently raise your hand. I am motivated, I am committed, Lord help me. But I want that to be part of my home. And either way, uh, praise the Lord. And if this has been helpful to you, we hope you share it.

Um, thanks so much for joining us. Hey, thanks for listening. And being a part of the 10 Million Legacies movement, go to be Courageous Ministry. Org for more biblically based resources, ways to switch where you spend your money that support the mission, and information about the incredible Be Courageous app community for believers.

Also, we wanted to quickly tell you about our six week online Parenting Mentor program.

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This is an incredible, self-paced program. We cover everything from tending to their hearts, handling obedience to overcoming mistakes most Christians are making. But more than that, it’s a supportive community. You’ll have access to our private group and the Be Courageous app, live webcasts, and direct access to us.

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