A Parenting Gap Wreaking Havoc On Our Kids Souls

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Episode Summary

This spiritual law should be a tool used as part of the daily fabric of your parenting if you want to launch confident Christian kids into today’s uncertain world. You will get practical insights you can use for all age groups.

A few simple disciplines woven into your daily parenting rhythm can make all the difference. The parenting gap that could be hurting your kids future walk with God is teaching the spiritual law of reaping and sowing.

We cannot grow weary while doing good work as parents. It’s vital we don’t go into escapism instead of parenting well.

It has a lot to do with how you respond to your kids when they have challenges in their lives. It’s important to bring sowing and reaping into the conversation. No one can run away from the law of sowing and reaping which is an eternal issue.

An example:  if I’m angry at my kids I’m sowing a legacy of anger in them. That’s of the flesh and not of the spirit.

1.You Must Teach God’s Authority To Your Kids

  • If they don’t believe in God, the spiritual side of sowing and reaping is meaningless.
  • It should be woven into the fabric of your family dynamics.
  • This is ingrained in our daily lives, we talk to our kids about this almost on a daily basis since they were toddlers throughout their whole life.
  • Look for opportunities to teach your kids that God is the ultimate authority, he’s real, he loves us, in fact, he loves us so much that he will allow challenges to get our attention. He might allow us to be tested.
  • We must teach what fearing God is and looks like. The kind of fear that has reverence for who God is and His power over our lives. He has control over our lives, we have free will and ability to choose but he also has control.
  • Teach by praying with your kids. Are we praying reverently or just memorized sayings at dinner? 
  • Praying out loud teaches your kids you can have a relationship with God. 
  • They have to see parents surrendered to God’s authority. If they don’t they probably won’t believe in the spiritual side to sowing and reaping.
  • Putting God in His rightful place in your life is a crucial example for your kids. Are there any idols you need to take off a pedestal?
  • The Bible is the living breathing word of God. It’s the inherent word of God, all of it is true. Do your kids understand that? Do they see your conviction in it? Do they see you reading the old and new testaments and connecting the dots? Do you make it relevant to their world?
  • Do you share how God has answered prayers your family has prayed for? That you have prayed for?
  • Your kids must see your active faith.
  • If they truly know God, then the principle of sowing and reaping will mean something deep to them.
  • If God is the authority in your life then your kids should see you obeying it’s truth.
  • If we are going to sow Godliness in our children, it’s only done through the wisdom and power of the holy spirit. We must know the word to share wisdom with them.

Your number one ministry is your family

2. Teach Through Consequences

  • There’s a physical truth of this which could have nothing to do with the spiritual.
    • Example: If you don’t study, you won’t do well on the test.
  • The spiritual ones are even more important.
  • The ramifications of sin gone undealt with for a long period of time are legacy destroying.
  • Unfortunately what’s often preached in our churches is only the grace of God.
    • There are real consequences for unrepentant sin.
  • Parents are the God-given authority over kids. Its vital parents say no, are tough, and even cancel plans if kids are in error.
    • It’s an opportunity to teach your kids by giving consequences for bad behavior.
  • Unfortunately, too many parents are weak. This is the souls of your kids that’s at stake.
  • We want to raise our kids to be confident Christian kids ready to launch into an uncertain world.
  • Teach your kids to judge who they are close friends with.


3. Practical Tips by Age Groups

  • Ages 0-3
    • Family Bible time, a practical way to teach the word of God.
      • They need to know that evil company corrupts good habits.
      • Sow the seed of the word of God.
    • Teach situational consequences. If you do this then this will happen.
      • Get the “If-Then Chart” DoorPost.com gives tons of resources, use the code all caps COURAGEOUSMOM to get a discount.
  • Ages 4-11
    • Sibling relationships are huge for training your kids.
      • These are lifelong relationships.
      • Opportunities to encourage your kids to grow and move away from selfishness.
    • Consequences of lying, how God detests a lying tongue
    • Dealing head-on with manipulation.
      • Any sin should be handled directly using the name of the sin
    • Disobedience and how it hurts their relationship with God. 
      • A standard of obeying the first time, and the importance of respecting authority
    • The reasons parents don’t go over consequences with kids is that it takes more time. Parents are selfish for their own agenda and time. It takes slowing down, getting on their eye level and communicating the consequences of their actions.
  • Ages 12-18
    • Anyone that tells you the teenage years are harder, that only happens if you don’t do Biblical parenting.
    • We are loving the teenage years!
    • God wants us to be pure and sharing the consequences of not being pure.
    • If we are equipping kids, then we need to educate them ahead of time about the consequences of sin.
    • Social media; what you post brands you. Your identity on the internet should be true and righteous.
      • The algorithms know you by what you’ve clicked or looked at, scrolled slower on. It is building an algorithm that learns what to tee up for you in your newsfeed.
      • Are you creating a pure algorithm by your viewing habits? What do social media algorithms say about you?
      • You don’t want to be branded by what social media companies know about you. 
    • You can teach the principle of sowing and reaping regarding jobs, school, money…

If you sow sparingly you will reap sparingly. So as parents we have a huge lesson there too.

We want to sow bountifully into our children the word of God so it reaps bountifully a life that is righteous, holy and living on the right path.

We should believe in big things, be bold for doing big things for God, and we should encourage our kids to do that and sow deeply for the Glory of God.

We don’t want to be sowing sinfulness in our kids and we also want to be encouraging them in what to be walking in.

There should be consequences for bad behavior but also good things happening when they do what’s right. Teach our kids that they can be sowing the word of God in their relationships and how they live their lives.

While they are in our homes we want to have these conversations while we have the most influence on them before we launch them into the world. It doesn’t mean we purposefully find consequences for them, there should be plenty of teaching opportunities if we are willing to see and act on them.


Scriptures In This Episode

Galatians 6:7-10Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap. For he who sows to his flesh will of the flesh reap corruption, but he who sows to the Spirit will of the Spirit reap everlasting life. And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart. Therefore, as we have the opportunity, let us do good to all, especially to those who are of the household of faith.”

2 Timothy 4:1-5I charge you therefore before God and the Lord Jesus Christ, who will judge the living and the dead at His appearing and His kingdom: Preach the word! Be ready in season and out of season. Convince, rebuke, exhort, with all longsuffering and teaching. For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine, but according to their own desires, because they have itching ears, they will heap up for themselves teachers; and they will turn their ears away from the truth, and be turned aside to fables. But you be watchful in all things, endure afflictions, do the work of an evangelist, fulfill your ministry.”

Colossians 3:23-24And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance; for you serve the Lord Christ.”

1 Corinthians 15:33 “Do not be deceived: “Evil company corrupts good habits.”

2 Corinthians 9:6But this I say: He who sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and he who sows bountifully will also reap bountifully.”

Proverbs 22:6 & 8 “Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it.”


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Thank you for being part of this movement to equip 1 million families and their legacies with Biblical truth to raise confident Christian kids in an uncertain world.

Written By Angie Tolpin
Angie has been married to Isaac for 19 years and together they have eight children, whom she homeschools. She is the Founder of CourageousMom.com, a doula, the author of the best-selling book Redeeming Childbirth, and the creator of the first ever Christian Postpartum Course. Angie loves ministering to Women and has created a few online Bible Studies on Biblical Friendship and Motherhood.

Reader Interactions


  1. Aubrey Linerode says

    So, so good! In today’s world there’s so much sugar coating of Truth; it is incredibly refreshing to hear solid, Godly teaching. I am a homeschooling mom of 4 ages 8-2 and you truly blessed and encouraged me! 💕

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