In today’s world, this is more important than ever. We are to teach our kids about every aspect of things and be the first to do so. Unfortunately well-intentioned parents are often last to teach them about sex. If it’s hard for you to talk about sex with your husband it’s probably really hard with your kids.
How did you learn about sex?
Some crazy stats (Source)
- 21% of Christian teenage girls have sent a naked picture of themselves
- The largest age group consuming internet porn is kids ages 12-17.
- 90% of 8 -16-year-olds have viewed porn.
Do you want your kids to have the same experience you did in how you learned about sex when you were a kid?
We Must Be Proactive Vs. Reactive Parents
- You must teach them earlier than you probably think.
- Proactive means doing things before there’s a need for what you are teaching them.
- Doing things in advance of what they are going to face in the future.
- This conversation should be woven into the fabric of your parenting
God’s Design For Sex Series
- We’ve used these books for over a decade and they’ve revamped them so they are relevant to today’s issues.
- How to have all the right conversations from young to older.
- Do you have healthy conversations with your kids?
- Modest but helpful illustrations.
- Over 1 Million copies sold.
Godsdesignforsexbooks.com
It’s Vital To Create Open Communication
- You have to ask questions that force a response often.
- Be patient and really listen.
- Use the coach approach; Ask three questions deep.
- Proactively engaging them on tough topics.
- Teach them the Biblical truth about sex. That it’s for marriage and it’s pleasurable, it’s a good thing!
- Teach that it’s also meant for procreation.
Practical Tips
- Use the real terminology for things.
- Teach your kids how to hold their thoughts captive.
- Tell your boys, it is a good thing that you are attracted to girls. But that’s for marriage, we aren’t to act on that and pursue a girl unless you are the right age and you feel they are marriage potential.
- When you start being vulnerable and having tough conversations it makes your kids comfortable to continue. This is vital so they are comfortable coming to you.
- Never skip scripture when going through books of the bible.
Instill Your Kids Confidence In Their Purity
- They can’t be confident in it if they don’t know what the bible says and can’t talk to you.
- Teach them the Biblical truth about their bodies. It’s not theirs.
- It’s vital for raising confident Christian kids for an uncertain world.
- They need to have a personal conviction to stay pure.
- Do you have open communication about these things with your kids.
- Let them know in advance that when unappropriate things happen, they can come to talk to you and not be embarrassed.
- If you aren’t right there having the open conversations the world can’t wait to inform your kids in the wrong ways.
- Social media algorithms are built by what we have told it we like so it can feed us more of it.
- We are training algorithms to show us more of what we scroll slowly on.
- There’s a record of this that could be used against us.
Relationship With Your Kids
- If your kids don’t grow up having conversations about the most important aspects of life, you likely won’t have a close relationship when they are older you hope for.
- Parents aren’t life-transforming, God’s word is.
Scripture Used In This Episode
1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 “For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you should abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you should know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, not in passion of lust, like the Gentiles who do not know God;”
Romans 12:2 “And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.”
2 Corinthians 10:5 “casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ,”
Romans 6:13 “And do not present your members as instruments of unrighteousness to sin, but present yourselves to God as being alive from the dead, and your members as instruments of righteousness to God.”
1 Peter 1:15 “but as He who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct,”
Ephesians 6:10-12 “Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. “
Ephesians 6:17 “And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God;”
Resources
- God’s Design For Sex Books, over 1 million copies sold. Must have books to teach about sex.
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All Ministry Resources: becourageousministry.org
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- Exclusive access to the courageous kid’s podcast. Play it for your kids to stir up good discussions.
- Monthly LIVE Q&A with the Tolpins; ask the anything.
- Powerful Biblically minded community.
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- You get your own profile and can connect with others.
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Relevant Resource Links:
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- FREE Courageous Parenting Workshop; Get the Parenting Packet Download!
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