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Full Transcript:

Note: This is an automated transcript and misspells or grammar errors may be present.

Welcome to Courageous Parenting Podcast, a weekly show to equip parents with biblical truth on raising confident Christian kids in an uncertain world.

Hi, I’m Angie from Courageous.

Mom and Isaac from Resolute Man Together pursuing the mission to impact 10 million families and their legacies for the Kingdom of God.

We’ve been married for 23 years and are seeing the fruit from raising our nine children biblically. Based on the raw truth found in the Bible.

We can no longer let the culture win the hearts of children, as too many from Christian families are walking away from their faith by the age of 18. And it doesn’t have to be this way. It shouldn’t be this way.

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If you want access to all the episodes, show notes, and other biblically based resources, go to Be Courageous Ministry.

Org. Join us as we start another important conversation about effective parenting in a fallen world.

Well, thank you so much for joining us today, Helen. We have Helen Smallbone on the podcast today, and we’re excited to talk to you guys about marriage and parenting. And I know that today is going to be an encouraging time because my husband and I just got to watch The Unsung Hero. And so I have a couple questions about your life and just the the way that you were raising your kids. That was just, um, it was a thought provoking movie to watch as a mom. Okay. Yeah. In the sense of, you know, when when we go through life, I think that every parent wants to protect their children from experiencing hardships. There’s just this protective, nurturing element of motherhood, of parenthood where that’s like the gut instinct. But what I saw portrayed in the movie was that you guys were actually transparent. You did something that was countercultural and you brought your children alongside you. And really what I witnessed was discipleship through a life trial and through hard. And so I would love for you to share. What inspired you guys to be transparent? Was that part of your entire parenting journey, or was that a pivotal point in your parenting where you realized, I’m thinking specifically when you guys moved and and you had that meeting together?

Mhm. Mhm. I think it is a foundation of probably who we are in our relationship obviously. Um, in a normal, you know, life, you may not invite kids into that space of where things are and what’s going on. However uh, from um for the majority of the children’s lives, David’s worked from home, which means that you’re in. And it’s been his business. It’s not like he’s been working for somebody. So the kids have been involved in the family business, and I think that sent the precedent for what you see portrayed in the movie, in that he was in Christian music prior when we were in Australia. Uh, it was at a concert that we lost, uh, over a quarter of $1 million in the late 80s, which is a I mean, it’s a lot of money now, but it’s a lot, a lot of money back then. Um, and so we they knew that. They knew we were going. We sold our home, we moved states, uh, we downsized. We sold a lot of stuff trying to pay debt. Um, they were a part of really a lot of it. They would do mail outs for our concert tours. We would go to the tour. We would go to the concerts a lot of times in the local area as family, um, we would put flyers on seats, we would put flyers on cars.

So we were living life together anyway, which is what I sort of feel families are about. I found when we came here and I saw the American culture much more divided. You know, the ten year olds go and the ten year old class, there’s five year olds go, you know, and maybe you’ve got to do it by the number of kids and activities that you’ve got going on. But in Australia it was much more, uh, together. And I found it very hard to actually have everybody divided off into different things. Um, when we came here, after having lost all that money, major life change, we’re moving to America. We’re here. We sort of get settled in our rental home, even though we have no furniture, even though we have no car. It’s just us and our 16 suitcases. Um, we knew all we had really, because so much had been stripped away. We had our culture stripped away. We had had family stripped away. We’d had friends stripped away. All we had was God and each other. And so the togetherness of yesteryear became a necessity because we were under such pressures that to be together now became our lifeline. Really.

Well, it’s really evident in the movie for sure. I know that from my husband and I. We went through a business failure in 2016, and we had, uh, we were at a crossroads of how much do we share with our kids and how much do we not share with them because we don’t want them to worry and freak out. Right. And it wasn’t really something that was modeled or talked about, even in the Christian parenting teaching realm, right? It’s just not something that people like openly will share and say, hey, you should really like this is an opportunity to come together and work as a family. And that was actually what we did, because we are our history is we had lived on, um, a small property, four acres, when the kids were little for ten years, and we had this land and we asked God, how do we what should we do to steward it? What should we grow? And we decided to do a vineyard because it was something that we could plant and work on together. And everybody had their favorites. And so they grew up working together.

So then when we had this loss, we looked at it and we went, you know what? This is a time for us to come together again. And we shared that. But what’s interesting is in sharing that we’ve had a mixed, um, response to how we handle trials, right? Like where there’s some people that go, well, that’s really convicting because that’s I mean, that’s element that’s a huge test of humility, right? To come before your kids and say, hey, our business has gone under and we’re potentially going to foreclose on a home. And like so much of it, when we watched your movie, my husband and I were just were holding hands and he squeezed my hand at that moment, like, sound familiar? You know, but what was inspiring is how your kids all stepped up and everyone was working together. And, you know, the jar in the movie where you said, um, you maybe you want to share about that. And the the other aspect that went along with it was your please and thank you wall that was so touching.

We did not actually have the please and thank you wall. We did not actually physically have the jar as well, but the sentiments were there, if you know what I mean. Like we were literally sitting down and thanking God for what had been. We were literally sitting down and praying for daily needs. We were combining money. It just they visually represented what was going on, but they put a visual to it and the visual is so strong. I mean, they have done such a brilliant job of showing a visual to what was functionally going on in the family. For me, I’m I’m a very open book. We when Rebecca, our daughter Rebecca Saint James during her early career and I’m not exactly sure where she got it from, but there was a quote that she used a lot and she said, where there are no secrets, there are no lies. And I think it’s a really important fundamental statement, life statement where there are no secrets, there are no lies. And I think for us and for me personally, I’m a pretty open book. Like what you see is what you get like, and I think it helps us to keep authenticity. It helps us to live in humility because you are not afraid to say to somebody, kids, whatever, hey, I was wrong, you know, I’m sorry, you know, and it’s practicing those biblical principles. Um, I’m not. So we probably lived very openly anyway. And with regards to whether in struggle you include your children or not because of the pressure. Whatever. They know you’re under pressure. They know you’re under pressure. So if you don’t include them, they’re confused as to what’s going on with mum and dad.

I mean, why is all this happening? Why did they say no to us going on that trip? Why like so to me, it is much better to just lay it all on the table, get it all out. The challenge is, as a parent, then they’re watching you on your how you’re handling it now, because that’s where they gauge their response. If you’re overwhelmed and in tears in your bedroom, well, they’re going to be like, well, something’s really, really wrong. Oh my goodness. And they’ll take on your anxiety. But from my perspective, if we believe that God is in control of all things, all things, the good and the bad, like he’s in control, whether he makes them happen or not, he still sees. He still knows. He’s still allows. Yeah. Whether we understand what he’s doing or not, it’s still a principle that he is in control. Secondly, if we believe that God is with us until the end of the age which Jesus promised before he went up into heaven. Then how can we not accept what comes into our lives? I mean, how can we not look at it and think, okay, God, this is tough. I don’t know what you’re doing here, but you’re going to show something like, you’re going to reveal something about me, about a new direction. Um, you’re going to get my attention through that, like, you know, and you’re looking then as to what he’s doing. And it sets a whole nother premise of hope, of trust. And that’s what I want to portray to my kids.

Well, and I think about what are we preparing our kids for?

Amen. They’re going to have hard times if we protect them through the hard times that we’re facing. They’re not going to be set up to know how to handle hard times when they come to them. The other thing is, I’ve heard of parents who don’t allow kids to ever see conflict between husband and wife and the kids when they’ve grown up, say, I don’t know how to resolve conflict. I’ve never even seen it. Now, to me, that’s not living our lives openly because there will be conflict. Now, do we want to have it all laundered out in front of our kids? No. But they do need to know that we’re real, that we’re human, that we face good times. We face hard times. We face disagreements. We don’t always agree with one another, but we choose to love through the disagreement.

That’s right. That’s where faithfulness is actually pictured to a child, right? They can see a picture of what faithfulness looks like because it’s in their sense. If there’s never any trials and their parents are just always married and always faithful to one another, and then they experience hardship in their marriage and then they think, well, my parents never did this. They can’t understand I’m out because the something’s wrong. Simple. Then it’s we haven’t actually prepared our children for marriage. No.

So from my perspective, to live life openly, to live life with no secrets, I love that. Then. Then you’re allowing total authenticity. You’re allowing realness to be present in your home, to go to your kids and say, no, you can’t go to the skating event. They just think you’re being mean when you say you can’t go to the skating event. We haven’t got the money. Yes. Then they understand. You know what I mean? Like, it’s it’s it’s totally different.

And this is the other thing that one of the things I’ve noticed is kids are more perceptive than we give them credit for. And so. Oh, yes, for the intelligence. But understand that they also deal with lies from the enemy, just like we would. So if we don’t tell them what is actually wrong, but they sense something’s wrong, their little imagination and the enemy’s going to attack them with, oh, they’re just mad at you, or you’re just because you write x, y, z. That’s why you’re not able to go to the ice skating rink or whatever. Yeah, yeah. We’re literally, by not telling them the truth, we’re inviting a foothold for the enemy to deceive them and for it to actually create a harder relationship with our child. You know what I mean? Because he’s totally agree. He’s going to exploit any weakness that we have. Right? And so I want to shift and and talk about marriage for a second, because as far as weakness goes, there was a few moments of weakness that were portrayed in the movie, um, where your husband was wrestling.

Medical freedom is something we all desire, and I think we’d all agree that in the last four years, we’ve really realized just how important it is to have a trusted, like minded doctor.

You should be able to build your medical team and choose who you get care from. Knowing that where you spend your money is a matter of stewardship and a desire to support local Christian medical businesses.

Absolutely. I don’t know about you, but I prefer to help support businesses that have a biblical worldview on life and health.

Here’s the problem more often than not, you have to choose your doctor off a preferred in-network list. And if I’m really honest, those clinics usually see such mass quantities of people that it’s incredibly impersonal and you walk away feeling like a number. In addition, in most cases, in order to be seen by specialists, you’re required to get a referral from a primary care physician, which costs more time and money.

We want to introduce you to a biblical approach to health care Samaritan Ministries. You can find out more about it at Samaritan Ministries. Org forward slash be courageous.

They’re a health sharing ministry built on biblical principles of bearing one another’s burdens practically, financially, through helping with health care costs and spiritually through praying and caring for one another.

Samaritan ministries gives you the freedom you desire to choose your doctors and health care professionals, including. This is cool alternative care providers like chiropractors and naturopathic providers as well.

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When you sign up don’t forget to tell them that be courageous mystery or Angie and Isaac Tolpin referred you.

The links will also be in our weekly podcast show notes at Be Courageous Ministry.

Org wrestling.

Purpose. He was wrestling with um God with his call on his life. He was wrestling with leading. And so as a wife I know from just even from this ministry, we have so many women that reach out who struggle, who say, how can I encourage my husband to be a spiritual leader? How can I encourage my husband and and help him to know that I believe in him, but encourage him to step forward in faith, to walk out the life that God has for him. I think you’re the perfect person to be asking this. Not because I am and I’m not.

But I because my husband’s always been a believer, you know, like I haven’t, I haven’t now has he stepped. I think there’s some fundamental things here that go beyond just that scenario of how do I support my husband? One is, as women from Eve, we were given a desire to have power and control.

Amen. Yeah.

So we’ve got to be aware of our own weaknesses. So when we see our husbands maybe not stepping up, what do we do? We take over.

Yeah.

And then it makes him sit back even more and think, well, I don’t have to do it. She’s going to do it. So we, you know, there there comes a point of time where you’ve got to be aware of our own weaknesses in that. I think our second weakness as women is we use words too much. If my husband, when he was down and really struggling, I had he used words to say, you’re not providing for us. How did you let us get into this scenario? What are you going to do? How are you going to solve it? I think he would have died. I mean, he would have curled up and died. He nearly does anyway. But he was struggling so much that my words and my belief in him became very important. And I think a lot of times if we can’t say words that are going to, we’ve got to remember as women and wives, your husband and you are on the same team. Yes. You don’t pull down your team. You don’t go to your team and say, how dare you miss that goal? Like, because then they’re going to feel more insecure the next time they go to shoot. They’re going to miss it again. You got to say, hey, you tried real hard. Sorry you missed it, whatever. But you were on a same team. And sometimes I think as husbands and wives, we think we can kick them when they’re down or we can criticize them. You’re criticizing yourself. I mean, you’re pulling down what God has created, which is a oneness. You’re together. You are one. You are on the same team. So I think that’s another fundamental thing. If you can’t think of nice things to say, don’t say anything at all. Keep your mouth shut. My mom used to say to us kids all the time, can’t think of anything nice to say, then don’t say anything at all. And I think again, it’s a life principle. We’ve got best keeping your mouth shut. If you can’t think of anything good to say.

Yeah.

No, I think it’s great advice. It reminds me of the scripture. I think it’s Proverbs 3127. She does him good and not harm all the days of her life.

Amen.

And we gotta remember that stuff.

Yes.

And just the basic why were we created? There was a loneliness. God said it was not good for man to be alone. So he created a helper. Is it helpful to speak those? You might call them truths. We’re in this situation, but is that helpful? He already knows about the situation, right? Like he doesn’t need to be told. And so instead, I think that’s one other.

Sorry, I shouldn’t have cut you off. Um, I think there’s one other really important thing. Um, in in in this. Now, I’ve lost my thought. Gosh. Um, where was I going? Um. Um. It’s gone. It’ll come back.

Sorry.

That’s fine. We can always cut it, too. So you’re fine. You know, I think that talking about marriage, there’s this element of, um, team ness, oneness that a lot of people, um, well, especially in Western cultures, I don’t find it as much in other cultures, like the Latino culture. They tend to have even biblical gender roles down more. What I saw in witness, I would love to hear your opinion and if if that was accurate. But what I witnessed was in a time of struggle, financial struggle, you were the wife who remained in your biblical gender role, supporting, believing and managing the home and taking care of the kids and encouraging your husband. You didn’t pull up a side hustle necessarily. Or maybe you did, I don’t know, but from the from the movie it portrays that you didn’t. Right?

And that’s correct.

I think that this what it said to me, and this is one of the things that I think women today struggle with a lot is discontentment with what’s being provided. And just they get fed up in a sense, and then they take matters into their own hands. And there’s this movement of bringing my husband home, so to speak, that people talk about a lot, like I want my husband to retire early, so I’m doing this right. But that does. You and I both know that time is a commodity, and if you spend time doing one thing here, that means you’re not spending time doing something over here with your kids, right? Especially in specific seasons. Can you speak to your experience, what you’ve learned, what your conviction was about that? Um.

Well, my.

Conviction, again, is God’s in control. If, if, if you if your husband isn’t I mean, maybe he’s not stepping up and providing as you can as he should.

I mean, you.

You’ve got to take it to God. I mean, I, I realized that when everything is stripped away. So when we lost everything and we’re starting again with nothing. You have a lot of choices, I suppose, but you that some going to be very destructive and some may be helpful. But I realize that my phone. You realize what your foundation of your home is, and I’m very thankful that both David and I grew up in Christian homes, where it was modeled a healthy Christian marriage. And I realized too, in that time, and I probably didn’t know it before, but my foundation was in Jesus, not in my husband. So when my husband failed, in a way Jesus was still there. I could trust him. So even when, um, David was feeling weak, I wasn’t putting my faith in David. I was putting my faith in God like he’s going to provide for us. He’s going to care for us to live simply. It’s sometimes beautiful. I mean, I’ve had some of the nicest times, like the kids were sleeping on the floor when we first arrived. We treated it as an adventure. Kids are so malleable. They they are taking their cues from us as parents, but they’re so malleable. I mean, they just they just go with the flow, you know? And frankly, when we lived so closely together with them, there were times as parents when we might have been more overwhelmed, and it was the kids who encouraged us. It’s going to be okay, mom. You know, even in the movie where they’re praying for things to be cheap and the child is the one who puts the pieces together and realize by coupons, God had made everything cheap. And he takes the the wanted nor the needed note and puts it in the thank you. The parents hadn’t realized that. I hadn’t realized that in the movie as the mom, the child realized it. And so sometimes we need our kids to actually encourage us when we’re feeling a little overwhelmed and they’re like, mom, God’s got this. And you’re like, yeah, he does like the faith.

Like a child.

Having faith like a child.

We’re all challenging that.

Hey there. We just wanted to invite you to join us in the next Parenting Mentor program, where we talk more about the heart of parenting in session two. So take a listen to this next little clip and we hope you join us.

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It’s a beautiful image. Resiliency is another topic that I kind of grabbed as watching. And today, in today’s culture and the world and all the things that we see, there are a lot of moms that are overwhelmed and worried about the world their kids are launching into. And there is a need for us, realistically, to raise resilient children for the world, right? With trusting God. Like you were just saying.

Um.

What is your word to moms who are scared of launching their kids? And what was something God taught you about resilience? And because I see it, it’s a theme throughout that.

The theme is probably more from David. David’s actually pretty resilient. Um, he in a way, the so in a movie, you have to have an antagonist and a protagonist. So they have to choose how the story is going to be portrayed when they’re scriptwriting. They chose David to be the antagonist. So he’s the one who’s overwhelmed, struggling, and he was. But they took his internal feelings and made them more external. David, by nature, is more of an optimist than what he was ever portrayed in the movie. Um, I was portrayed the protagonist. There was a certain strength in me. Yes, it was probably there. He may have portrayed me a little more, you know.

Stronger than.

Good, stronger maybe than I was, or definitely what I was feeling. Um, but I didn’t feel that it was, I feel like.

Um.

I feel like those were my core issues too. Like like not issues my core, like I do feel in my core, I was strong. How you live that out day by day. Uh, you know, that’s another thing. I think we, as in our current culture, are struggling to trust God. I really think that’s the core of it because, again, God sees us. He knows us. He knows what we’re going through. He knows what our needs are. He promises to be with us. So everything comes back to our response to where we’re at. And I personally can’t I can’t reconcile having a negative attitude on life, on my circumstances or anything, because then we’re denying that Jesus is with us and we’re denying that he’s going to care for us. We’ve got to look on the positive. As Christians. We’ve got to look on the positive. We’ve got to look for the hand of Jesus. We’ve got to look for where he’s leading us, and he is leading us. He is there. It’s just we don’t often open our eyes. We get so overwhelmed by what our circumstances are that we forget to see him anymore. So my encouragement to to to wives, to people who are struggling look for Jesus because he’s there. You just don’t let your circumstances overwhelm you enough that you don’t see him and you don’t trust him anymore.

That’s true. When you were saying that, it actually reminds me of the importance of what we just talked about regarding having faith like a child, and the importance of allowing your children to come together and to be aware of what’s going on, because sometimes adults need their kids to remind them of the good things, like you were saying with the coupon, just. Yeah. For the coupons, right? Yeah, yeah. Like it sometimes as adults. That’s why God and he knows this. That’s why he tells us to have faith like a child. Right. And so what is the best way to have faith like a child? To be challenged by sitting with a child who has faith to asking your children to pray for you to pray together? I mean, my husband used to we would sit around the table and we had a blessing chart. Actually, we did dry erase boards. So a different version. Yeah. When we were going through hard things, we would write down all the things that we were thankful for because the, the hard things were so big that we needed something to remind us and to be thankful. Because Philippians four talks about be thankful in all circumstances. Pray. Yeah. With Thanksgiving. Yeah.

Yeah, right.

That’s the equation, is that we pray in all circumstances with Thanksgiving though. But when you’re in the midst of hardship, you’re not necessarily looking for what to be thankful for.

Mm.

I think the importance of living life with Thanksgiving is one is really allowing. It’s making you see God. It’s making you look for God. It’s making you appreciate, um, that God has you here for a reason. Um, and then once you. And it helps you release your hands, I a lot of times think we as adults, we we we take too much, we hold it and it overwhelms us. And we can’t see beyond it because our fists are, like, up in front of our face and we’re holding it, and we can’t see beyond that. What I feel like praise and worship and thanksgiving does is it makes us open our hands and let the things go. And once we open our hands, that’s when we see God. Um, and I think it’s just a life principle for every single one of us to just keep a loose rein on our lives, uh, and and submit everything to him. Pray before, like, should I be doing this? Pray about it. Not I want this. So I’m going to do this. Should you be wanting that? Is that a God thing that you should be wanting? Should you be taking that job like have you prayed about it? Has God opened this opportunity for you? Or are we taking control of our own lives and just dragging God along, hoping that he blesses what we want? I don’t know, it’s something each of us have to ask ourselves. We do.

Are we looking? Are we asking the right question? God’s will versus God’s will for my life, right? So many people are seeking for God’s will for their own life. Instead of looking for what God’s will is and joining him in that work.

That’s correct, that’s correct.

So there were two quotes in the movie that really hit us. I know that, um, my husband, he kind of nudged me a couple times where grandpa said to your husband, be a man, my son. Um, and in that moment, like, we, we just kind of whispered, it’s so like, just to see his response and see the change. I mean, the acting was so wonderful, right? Like to see that, like, oh, yeah, I’m going to be a man kind of stand up straight. Um, that’s what we need more of in this culture is men calling out manhood in their sons.

Right.

And that is actually a quote I don’t know if, you know, it’s a quote from the poem if by Rudyard Kipling, really. And for whatever reason, I was not aware of this, but my nephew knew he lived close to David’s father and, um, he apparently must have learnt this poem if as a school kid and he’s got now his grandchildren growing up and he’s got some grandsons near him, and he would quote parts of that poem to his grandkids at appropriate times. So it was very real to not necessarily our kids experience and my experience, but to, um, David’s brother’s kids experience. And they brought that into the movie. There’s another quote that’s right near there that comes from grandpa, which is, I think, a strong theme for the movie. And he says, your children aren’t in the way. Your family is not in the way. They are the way. Yeah. And I first up, I did not necessarily understand one where the quote came from because I don’t believe it did come from grandpa. And then secondly, what it really meant. But I went to Joel, who helped write the script and directed helped direct the movie with the the the other script writer and director, Richie Ramsay.

And I asked him where it came from, and he said, Richie came up with it. And Richie’s a dad of five kids. And I went to Richie and said, where did you get the code from? And he said, well, I actually listened to a podcast by a Catholic priest, and I think it came from there. And it stuck out to me, and I thought it would be really good to include in this movie because it’s such a strong family statement. And I said to him, so what do you really what do you what did you take from that? Like that statement? What were you thinking? That it was how it was, what it was meaning. And it came back that the meaning, the way that I feel it’s been taken anyway, is that a lot of times we think as parents, our family is in the way, you know, you hear parents saying, I can’t wait for the kids to get out of the home.

Yeah, they’re.

In the way. I can’t oh, we’re going to have to get a new car. Just expense. I mean, we’ve always got these expenses. They’re in the way. Um, we’re going to need a bigger home because everybody’s got to have their own room. I don’t agree with that philosophy, but they’re in the way, you know. So so I’m seeing parents looking at kids as a burden that they’re carrying, and they’re in the way they’re loading me down. They’re making me heavy. I’ve got to, you know, it’s just hard. Your family is the way and it’s a whole different ball game. And I think that’s where I. I am so encouraged by the movie because when your family is the way it’s saying, that’s the legacy that you’re leaving. That’s where you know, your as you pour into your kids, they are then going to pour out. And I just think it’s such a strong statement that each of us, as parents and in families, need to sit back and look at our own attitudes. And are we seeing our family as in the way, or are we seeing our family as the way? Because culture is made up of families and as Christians, if we’re not raising strong kids who can impact culture, then culture will fall.

Oh, you are preaching to the choir, I love this. Thank you so much. I love it. Um, let’s end on one thing. The very last statement. At the end of the movie, it says, if you want to change the world, go home and love your family.

Yeah, from Mother Teresa.

And I just, I, I think that if we all really reflected on what that means to love your family. That’s the first step. I know a lot of people who want to change the world, who want to have impact on the world. And, um. For Isaac and I, this podcast kind of fell in our lap, and it’s just a ministry that we’re able to do on our time that works with our family and our kids do it with us. A lot of the time we have a kids.

Class.

And it’s become something that has been a way to model for them what it looks like to be evangelistic, to share the word, to to live a biblical life and encourage other people and be a part of the body of Christ, be a member of it. Right. In that sense, and using gifts. And I’m thankful for it. But for us, family comes first. Like we will never sacrifice family for ministry. And I think that sometimes in the Christian world, because people, they their intentions are right, they just love God and they want to serve him. But in the process, they can get distracted and even justify the work that they do in ministry because it’s for God leaving their families in the background. Yeah. You didn’t do that, though, and that’s evident in a sense, by the closeness of your family. When I was I’m actually visiting my mom in Oregon right now, and when I was flying here, I listened to your daughter’s podcast interview with her brothers, Joel and Luke, right there.

For King and Country.

And hearing them talk and being able to sense their relationship a little bit by their their conversations, by their laughter, by the things they were sharing. Obviously, a lot of what they’re sharing, they learned from you guys and they gave credit to you guys. And it and I think that, um, I know from listening to that podcast, your daughter mentioned something about mum life and a ministry that you have. Could you just hear at the end of the podcast, share with people where they can find you, maybe even about the book that you wrote? Yeah.

Yeah. Um, I.

Think that.

So.

About ten years ago, um, God led me into a mentoring mum’s ministry. Um, and I found my place, in a way. And God’s used that to grow me because I’m really a behind the scenes person. I’m not really. You know, it was okay to encourage the kids to get out on a stage, but I definitely don’t want to be there. My most comfortable place is, uh, on our little farm, being outside, experiencing nature like it’s just to do all this sort of stuff is, is a bit foreign to who I really am, however I do. And so God led me on a gentle path of being a mentor to younger mums. And it was a ministry then called Mum to Mum. Um, and then we decided we would take it. We’d sort of ventured a little bit away from the mum to mum model, and we realised that we’d established sort of a new model and so we ended up setting up a ministry called Mum Life and where the mum in mum life is mothers, uplifting mothers and I just feel that that is the model, that is the biblical model. We are the older women that come alongside the younger women and encourage them on their journey to love their husbands, love their children and that’s what we do at Mum Life.

And we got about, I think 5 or 6 years ago, we had the opportunity to then step into a podcast area and we were on Access more. And so it’s called Mum Life Community and it’s where we are come both as a group of younger mums, with me as the senior mum and then a group of senior mums being interviewed by a younger mum on our experience on specific subjects and it’s very strong, you know, it really, it’s really encouraging mums to do what they do as you know, as best as they can. Be intentional. Yeah. Um, and then with my book, um, when we’ve shared our story over the years, people come back and they’re like, oh gosh, you guys need to write a book. Those stories are just amazing. And so for ages we were all like, yeah, maybe one day. And just living life. And then, um, about three years ago, um, I was sharing another story to a couple of people and they said, gosh, you need to write a book. And for whatever reason, God just changed me. And I’m like, yep, it’s time. I, um. And so I went to Dave and I said, just find me a book publishing deal.

The book came out, uh, probably nine months later, and the book is called Behind the Lights, and it’s a memoir. It’s my memoir. And the the the sub line is the extraordinary adventure of a mum and her family. And that’s what we’ve been given. We’ve been given an extraordinary adventure. Uh, you know, Jeremiah 2911 says, For God knows the plans that he has for you. They’re plans to prosper you, to give you hope and a future, not to harm you. And I think that’s what he’s done for us. He had plans. We knew nothing about that. He had to put us through hard times. He had to refine us. He had to take us in a new direction. He had to teach us. But he has done more than we could ever have asked. Imagined. So my My life verse these days is Ephesians 320. And I paraphrase my Bible verse because my brain would go like out the window. But Ephesians 320, paraphrased by me, is, uh, God can do much, much more than anything that we could ask or even imagine through his strength and for his glory. And I’m a living witness that God takes our simple lives and he does extraordinary things through them.

Well, thank you so much, Helen Smallbone, for joining us today on the Courageous Parenting Podcast. Um, I hope we can have you back again someday. It’s really fun.

Thank you. All right. Thank you.

Hey, thanks for listening. And being a part of the 10 Million Legacies movement, go to be Courageous ministry. Org, for more biblically based resources, ways to switch where you spend your money that support the mission and information about the incredible Be Courageous app community for believers.

Also, we wanted to quickly tell you about our six week online Parenting Mentor program.

Isaac and I created a powerful biblical curriculum. Here’s how it works. Each week, we release a video session with a downloadable parenting packet to make it easy for you to incorporate those teachings directly into your parenting.

This is an incredible, self-paced program. We cover everything from tending to their hearts, handling obedience to overcoming mistakes most Christians are making. But more than that, it’s a supportive community. You’ll have access to our private group in the Courageous app. Live webcast, and direct access to us.

If you’re interested in joining our next online Parenting Mentor program, secure your spot now at Be Courageous Ministry. Org that’s Be Courageous Ministry org.